NOT FAKE NEWS: If you are a human, you will experience at least one gnarly breakup in your life.
Breakups are typically not very fun, and since we can’t keep you from experiencing all the joy that comes from blowing up a relationship, we decided to share some tips on how to heal and grow after a crushing breakup.
Post Traumatic Stress
A bad breakup is traumatic and there’s a good chance that you’ll experience some level of post traumatic stress from your sudden life changing circumstance.
This week, Lexi and I share with you the ways to not only heal, but to grow after a crushing breakup.
It doesn’t matter if you broke it off or your ex was the one that called it quits…a breakup brings up a lot of issues that we need to confront like, self-doubt, identity, failure, life direction and the future.
Step 1 – Why Does This Hurt So Much?
In this show, we wanted to first talk about WHY a breakup can be so emotionally devastating. This part of the show we talk about the end of the fantasy, enmeshment, losing your teammate, splitting up your friends and hula-hoops.
Step 2 – Good Grief
Then, because the death of a relationship is emotionally the same to the Ego as a death of someone close to us (not at that level of severity, but, it’s still a death)…we go over the five stages of grief and chat about the absolute necessity to go through each and every one so you don’t set yourself up to repeating a lousy relationship pattern.
Step 3 – Post Traumatic Growth
Then, finally, we go over a number of techniques you can use to grow out of the grief and expand yourself to become more aware of the mistakes you made during the ex-relationship and more aware of your own personal life goals with a fresh perspective on where you want to guide your life.
There was a great article in Big Think that talks about turning tragedy into personal growth (click here for the link) and it references work done by a couple of psychologists around steps to grow and expand out of the healing process…they call it Post Traumatic Growth.
It’s all about learning how to heal after a terrible situation and how to then use your newfound strength to grow as a person.
Like always, I invite your comments or questions about this show and want to let you know that we have a video version over in the “video” section of the javabud.com website in case you want to actually see how the sausage is made.
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